Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
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