Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
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it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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