nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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