areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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