Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
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I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......