just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
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