the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
