How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
