Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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