they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
