She went from zero to smokin in five shots
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
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