Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
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I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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