I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
