My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
