I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize