I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
