i jhust puked up my retainher.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
