It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
She announced her abortion via fbk
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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