I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize