the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
