at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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