whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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