I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
