please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Randomize
