I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize
