Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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