TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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