tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize
