someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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