My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
