no, he came in my armpit
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
