I molested 6 butterflies tonight
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
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