I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize