I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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