Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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