The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
