There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Randomize