If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
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