ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize
