I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Randomize
