we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Randomize