im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize