It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
