Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
