so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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