ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
