how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
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