Tell her she can't have a vagina
it wasn't lemon gatorade
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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