Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
