Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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