i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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